kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
Have invented new cocktail. Any flavor of crystal light and vodka. I call it "I am going to die alone"
I'm pretty sure I just woke up to one of the airport janitors saying that she wanted to tie me up and do something.. I couldn't hear what, thank god
We almost forgot to tip the maids, so we left the rest of the gin, some tonic water and a lime. They earned it
But for real, I had the best sex of my life on that bunk bed
Opted for cash back rather than the 10% extra I'd get for store credit, solely for drinks tonight.
You're lovely.
You attract beautiful men with jobs. I attract ONE WITH A SOUL PATCH.
it was a sexy soul patch.
Reasons why I'm always right: I am older, I am wiser, I have a larger penis
I mean in all honesty I would let James Franco shit on my chest. End of story
Letting Freddy Krueger eat me out = HAPPY HALLOWEEN TO ME!!!
I think we've gotten passed awkward... the day I woke up at the palms and ur getting eaten out by the dude who just fucked me on the balcony.
I accidentally sent my dad a very explicit Star Wars fanfiction and he replied with "That was great!"
He played Harry Potter Fan Fiction videos to get me in the mood. He might be the one.
Hey, I left a taco in your dishwasher.
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