You made me cry and you don't even care
it was like fucking the hulk in a smartcar
Just ran into that chick u called from my phone and left her a MSG bout how she has aids
Ahaha, good shit
We need to start having sex underwater more often.
Someone just asked me if ur the girl that fell through the floor. I HAD to say yes.
Just did ten shots in 8.34 minutes........ Slowly getting over the loss
You're in a tuxedo, you can pee wherever you want.
The Mole People would help. They are a kind, helpful people, the Mole People are.
Mole people?
Mole people
We're so stoned that were both cuddling on the couch and crying over Forest Gump while eating popcorn. She asked me if I'd fuck away the sadness. I think she's serious.
I just meant the frequency of your blow jobs on a flow chart wouldn't look too promising
They're either celebrating their tax money or trying to kill each other.
I THINK it was the lead singer. Whoever he was, I have his number and his dick was pierced.
It was totally the lead singer.
I got a snap of someone jumping off a light pole. Was that you? Please confirm or deny. #onWisconsin
Don't tell him that you hope he dies in a boring missionary position with his wife. That doesn't go over well.
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
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