the couple across the street's about to bang. go get the popcorn and come join us.
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
They pulled him over whille he had a fish tank full of beer in his front seat. He told them it coudn't count as an open container cause the top was on it.
i would eat my own dick if it were covered in nutella
she got the salsa and pickles out of the fridge looked at me and said what can i make with this
Tell him next time im gonna be "disgrace to the family" drunk
that's why you don't digest questionable powders from girls wearing tutus at a dirty club
Do you relize what downtown will be like this week? Like open season. But instead of deer its hot baseball players from all over the country that we'll never have to see again. I swear the college world series is a gift from god.
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
White people are beatboxing! Save me.
She is currently expressing her joy for "bad to the bone" through interpretive dance...
Hypothetically how does one go about throwing away a dildo?
i wear a size 32DD bra. its basically impossible for me to get a speeding ticket
Fuck it, if you can't drink cheep beer and whiskey with me, I don't want you.
She's nice. But even when I am with her I am thinking of her mom, literally the hottest woman on earth.
Randomize
