problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
I just found out the guys at work had a bet as to who could sleep with me before i move away.
Who won?
All of them.
Im broke. I spend all my money on weed cigarettes alcohol and food. In that order. I cant even cut one of those because you know it'd be food. I already stopped getting my nails done just so i could support my bad habits.
I just realized I have my pepper spray, gun, and vibrator all in one drawer. One false grab and I'm screwed either way.
You kept saying thank you to the automatic toilet as it flushed your puke.
He was all like, "I've prayed every single day just for one more night with you."
Omg just give him a quick handy and walk out.
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
Want a slice of this weekend's hottest piece of ass?
He walked straight into the wall, said "excuse me ma'am" and continued back to his dorm room.
You are the tramp this city needs, but not the one it deserves.
That moment during finals day when you either convince your teacher to let you out of the room or you shit you pants.
Also if i get drunk and start crying about the elephants you all have my permission to abandon me.
Imma do four shots of whisky within two minutes and pass out. Otherwise this'll go badly.
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
what do u think we would be doing right now if we were together
Urinating on unicorns
Randomize
