Three of the best words ever! Cocaine. Research. Study.
please stop judging me for buying a handle of soco on a thursday at 10am. it was on sale, i'm thinking of my future.
Picture this: me driving down 183 throwing up into a towel. I just hit rock bottom.
Oh my Christ. I just came so hard my penis stood back up and took a bow afterwards. I need Thai food.
Who the fuck was that guy he kept pulling his dick out walking up to people trying to hand it to people and saying go ahead open the door like it was a door knob
Rush week is fine, only the t-shirts are white and if it rains, the frat boys in their lawn chairs will be treated to 800 freshmen girls in their first wet tshirt contest.
Welcome to college.
Faking my way through an entire party as a British exchange student. Wish me luck.
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
Last night turned out to be an expensive trip to your house between the ticket and the plan b. (Well I haven't gotten that yet)
pls come over. need ride to hospital once taquitos are ready
Are u alive? If u are, you deserve an award.
sitting in the prison waiting room in my boyfriends clothes. looooong story.
I just found glitter glue on my jesus bracelet...am I really that gay?
Just sent a nude with the caption "seasons greetings from our family to yours"
Who the hell tries to steal eggnog.
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