Im handcuffed to some kid i hardly know. there are no cops involved
I remember sucking his bleeding finger and then it's all black until he had his hand down my pants.
His bookmark is a piece of toilet paper. No shame there.
We're playing fucking games. GAMES. THIS IS BULL SHIT. IM GOING TO THROW UP ON THE BABIES AND LEAVE.
#1 benefit of having an equality sticker on my car: some girl flashed me while i was driving home
Hey. Can you be so hung over that you get a rash?
Don't talk about his dick. That's mine. There's a copyright on it. Use with permission
At least you got some premium homework time. Still drinking vodka from a coffee cup?
I switched to water. When the numbers get blurry you are no longer being productive.
i cannot be the only guy who has bought the every day with rachael ray magazine for use as porn
He's afraid of heights. How do I know, you ask? Blowjob on his roof.
Strip club for my birthday. And none of this discrimination shit. We're going to a guys one and girls one. Go get your singles.
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
Had a rough day but my boyfriend made that all better by going down on me while letting me watch Top Gear... I'm buying the engagement ring tomorrow
I feel like sleeping with foreign people is a long term investment. It's like a time share. Now when I go to London I have a place to stay.
I dunno. The drunker I get, the easier econ gets. I may be onto something here.
Randomize
