there hasn't been a girl guy ratio this good since a guy jumped on one of the Titanic life rafts
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
Disregard that. She just puked into her boot and started screaming.
my boss told me he would look for my wallet when he went back to the strip club tonight.
We need to reprogram your vagina to say "no"
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
God she is annoying. I am only keeping her around on fb because I want to see if her baby comes out looking like an alien or not.
It's gay pride, I'm in my EMT uniform getting more girls than your straight ass ever will..
Novelty of the week: Getting my lipstick back in an evidence bag
There's a guy masturbating in front of Sephora right now
Blacked out and Irish exited last night. At dinner. On a Sunday.
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
I just got out of the shower and I feel like I just washed off 10 lbs of bad decisions...
I don't think you understand I turned down McDonalds for you.
God yes pancakes and booze sounds like the best night ever.
Randomize
