I went out, and slept with my sunglasses on
If I see one more duchette wearing Ed Hardy, but not actually having a real tattoo. I swear Im gonna shank a bitch.
it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
ive come to realize my hair is a lot like my vagina. i put a bunch of shit in it with no result
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
i don't care what you say, the winery is open and 10am is NOT too early to go barrel tasting
He walked in, tore open the drawer, pulled out a condom, and slammed it shut. He was that ready.
he gets drunk and then tries to eat the lasers at the dance club
it's a "shave your legs in the cvs bathroom" kind of night
I'm a little nervous about this St. Patty's Day party. Seriously, we're still finding stuff from the Halloween party.
It started with jello shots. It ended with tears.
as i sobered up i realized that her cute accent was actually a speech impediment
it will be just like last year but no clogged toilets and more costumes.
I don't think tits should taste like fish.
Turns out naked yoga wasn't a pickup line. I feel betrayed.
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