She smells like mac and cheese, right after you add the cheese. It's strangely erotic.
She told me to "stuff her hole like a build-a-bear". I was so drunk I didn't even think that was weird.
please come get me his dick is out. i'm sitting on his couch and his dick is out. come now
Half my face is frozen, my vagina is broken, I'm wearing only gym shorts eating a plate of mashed potatoes, avatar is on my tv. There's a naked guy on my couch whose name idk. I needa talk to you asap
You gave me balls I gave you half a boob. Fair trade
Shits getting dirty between us in her dad's bedroom. I'm talking early millennium rap and r&b
She slapped me in the face with a McDouble. Just threw it right at my face while I was driving... That is why we can't bring her out in public.
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
His arresting officer when they were busting up the squat party recognized him from the anti-drone protest. He was like Jesus kid, you were sober last time.
My husband has seen you naked more times this week than me. I don't consider it a bad thing since you keep bringing the booze to our house. And because my tits are bigger.
We are making a pool on how long he stays sober this time you want in?
Why is there a business card for people who need bail bonds in my wallet...
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
I saw that he had a tattoo of a map of New Jersey on his arm, so i slowed down to like 20mph and pushed him out of the car
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
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