I kissed a girl and did not like it. Now I hate Katy Perry even more.
Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
in the event that i am dead, my body is laying in the intersection of ... the pearl in springfield. it was my friend's 21st but i think i'm dead. wearing a black top. like i said, probably dead.
I went to moterboat her and I started laughing, so I just kinda blew on them... I think I'm gona call that move the sailboat.
You were so hammed, you asked your buddy in Economics to plot a demand curve for Parmesan Cheese.
How did you steal an entire pie?
I don't know. It's in my purse.
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
im trying to find a facebook picture of him that doesnt make me regret sleeping with him. its not working
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
Your lower body and my face have had way too much contact lately.
I just realized I'm trading you a pregnancy test for the morning after pill...
It's been a bad semester.
I was like wtf you can warn a girl like hey I have a huge dick and I fuck for hours
Someone google feeding your vagina Advil and Neosporin
We were having sex and my nose just started pouring blood. He reached down to the floor, grabbed a sock and held it to my nose. He just kept pounding away like nothing was happening.
Reason # 294827284949272 i could never be a cop. I would just shoot. All the time. Ppl. Animals. Inanimate objects. Air.
I'm glad you threw up in my bed because now we talk.
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