Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
My mom just bought me $200 worth of booze on the condition that I promise I won't have to go to rehab eventually
He was in me and said I can't believe this happened because of facebook. MOOD KILLER.
Houston, we have a problem
where are u?
Houston. That's the problem. I don't know how I got here.
He kept his baseball cap on when he went down on me...
If you would give me the chance we might have the two separate pieces of the greatest fuck puzzle ever.
Just walked out of my apartment and came face to face with a shirtless dude playing with his balls and trying to tie his shoes.
My face is tingly. And my legs are being massaged by golden elves.
Hahahahahahhajahahahahajajjajahjahahajahahajajahahahajjajajahahjajajajajahahahajjjajajaahhahhahahahahahahahaha dominos taxi
Dave when you find that upper decker at your house its from me but its for Jill not you
Can't tonight. I'm supposed to get drugs for some college kids. Just doin my part in helping to enlight america's future
your ability to divide cases of beer among any given group of people equally was missed.
Putting Chia seeds in beer makes it ok for my diet, right?
They left around 10:00 this morning. I've been naked since 10:01.
Randomize
