Can't talk. I'm at the Tulsa Sheriff's office with a bunch of rednecks. I bet I'm the only one that voted for Obama.
I bet you're the only one who could read the ballott.
Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
she's walking around the room telling people she can make the room move with her mind and then she shakes her head really fast yelling 'see?!'
Its the Friday before break. There are 20 kids in my 300 person lecture hall. All with the same what the fuck am I doing here look on there face.
hey girl hope you're alright, you hit that tree really hard. have a good night.
Apparently blowing a .28 for a cop and then kissing her on the mouth is technically assaulting a police officer. Who knew.
A whole bunch of large men eating Doritos just knocked on my door and asked if they could take out my trash?
Her boobs take up a lot of room so God had to skimp on the brains
Wearing a french maid costume for Halloween sure did help me meet girls
Dude, they all thought you were gay.
Can we put this graduation on the shelf figuratively and go drink
I don't think I can recall what a 23 year old cock felt like if one slapped me in the face.
our next stoner-chievment: cream of shroom soup. Get over here, this is happening!
NEW HOUSE RULE! If you make it in a chicks cleavage it's 3 cups and bra off.
BP at your house from now on.
I could be writing so much lesbian porn right now but noooooo!
It should be perfectly legal to tase anyone not wearing a mask.
Randomize