..well, okay, so long as I don't have to wear an apron or vaccum in high heels.
nope just do me i'm drunk and easy to plz
Just walked by a guy on campus YELLING 'Im still hammered'
I found those 18 whoppers we bought.
Pre-game strategy: play thunder by yourself in the shower. Surprisingly, success.
that was you who tried to jump in front of my car in the monkey suit wasnt it
ugh... I can't wait for campus to get back. Then everyone will have other things to try to have sex with besides me.
If this week is any indication of my life here I've got to get out ASAP. My liver can't hack it.
The dumpster is full of naked people swimming. I'm going to join.
thanks for the 52 voicemails of you and crystal reciting the pleg of allegance
My dad just bought me a 40. I consider this our peace treaty.
I'm just sayin. If your gonna cheat go for someone TOTALLY different. Fucking her twin would be a waste.
It's getting harder and harder to fake orgasms as I get older.
Dude, you need better judgement.Trust me I know. I put my dick in the wrong mouths all the time
I plan on blacking out and milking a cow
We found him sitting in the back of the club crying into a strippers lap. She told us he missed his pet frog and to come back later.
Randomize
