Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
(917) i just came from walking.
haha you just came from walking?
I caught a rooster roaming Edison Park then released it in the bar. They made me try to catch it again and somebody played the chicken dance while I chased it
I looked at my arm when I woke up..I guess after 8 tally marks I said fuck it and wrote "too much"
I guess our biggest consolation is that we haven't woken up in a hottub with a dead dude. Yet.
I have migrated to the couch. Minimal movement is still happening, but I should be mobile enough to go to the liquor store by eight.......so that good.
I want to reach into my vagina and rip out my uterus with my bare hands. Understand how much it hurts now?
We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.
you told the police officer you wanted to be just like her one day but not a lesbian
Idk she didn't seem that weird to me but I had just eaten an entire tray of jello infused with liquor so I could be wrong...
I don't know what you're doing this morning, but obtaining Plan B is my number-one priority.
How much weed should I buy my mom for her birthday?
I’m also apparently a very socialist drunk now
Instead of a horny one. All I want to fuck is capitalism these days.
He kept apologizing that the nerve damage makes him take a while to finish. Meanwhile he gave me 3 orgasms and a leg cramp
Only you could benefit from a reckless driver
It's 3 am. Nothing I've tried can get the taste of failure and vomit out of my mouth.
Randomize
