seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
i just woke up and "where the fuck is taco bell" was in my search engine...
let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
Definitely just saw the guy I went on a date with Friday night dressed in medeival knight gear on the quad preparing for battle. Oh my God.
im sitting in my room wearing my power rangers shirt watching a movie about a magical dragon. Ive totally forgotten what having a sex life is like.
Just when I thought this night couldn't get any worse, my dad sang and dedicated Sexual Healing to me at kareoke night.
The only piece of furniture in the apartment is a wine rack.
Well call me tomorrow, it's a great story that may lead to me being fired and/or possibly being buried in a shallow grave somewhere out in wine country.
I pulled some girls weeve trying to pull the stop cord on the bus
Just walked into the library with a case of Strawberitas in hand.. no one said a word.. I think they were just impressed I knew where the library was
are we fucking for lunch or am I using my vibrator ?
She told me she loved my new hairstyle. I told her its called head head.
you ran up to the police and said "fuck the police shit we living in hell ". Then you dropped your Margarita and said "Darby Out" lol
I woke up hugging my purse and I found a business card in my underwear. How?
Also I found $40 in the women's bathroom at ihop. Karma is finally kicking in!
Randomize
