I just high-fived this girl after she swallowed.
i spent 15 mins trying to take money out of ATM with my drivers license saying, "what the fuckkkk" everytime it didnt work
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
Moms kinda upset I threw up in grandmas bedroom. I think ill stay in tonight.
Just got blown whilst getting my high score on bejeweled blitz. There's still a month and a half left of summer and my bucket list is empty...
He then proceeded to tell me about his enlarged lymph nodes, his"severe" case of blue balls.
I just dropped off shoes at Mike's hotel. The chick he hooked up with last night stole his phone and shoes.
A valiant attempt to obtain a backhoe was made
I take it that, because we are not guzzling a box of franzia, everything went alright?
we had break-up sex in a port-a-potty. how do you think it went?!
I already tell everyone in my office my bf is at the Naval academy. It slipped one time and I can't go back on it now
If youre worried about being stabbed, you probably shouldnt be there.
hey im sorry i made fun of the color of your sheets, but like it was all i could focus on during sex because they were just THAT UGLY
i hooked up with all four beatles on halloween get on my level
Randomize
