Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
Ya after that i took a dump on a car... We're definitely partying with him again
you kept telling her you'd make a great step-dad while cuddling her and rubbing her back...
we fucked while standing on a ladder. challenging, but worth it.
He left me a five minute voicemail apologizing for chasing me with a meat beater. I'm actually not sure what that means.
I really don't think you should have 'baptized' your tattoo in vodka the same night you got it.
I have to date her. We need a place to stay when we go tailgating.
He told me he loved me. I didn't know what to say so i just squirted the baby oil at him
When dressing for a 3way, how do I convey to the other chick I care enough to look pretty but not so much that it's a huge deal?
my extended weekend of being as irresponsible as possible started with blowing the bartender in the bar bathroom. off to a good start.
HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
He sent me a snap with the dog tongue filter. I might have to bench him.
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
The party pretty much ended once she shit on the couch
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