I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
Lady came into work yesterday. Full on stache and beard. I've never concentrated on making eye contact harder in my life.
I'm on the bus and the homeless person in the seat to my left is jacking off to a cartoon picture he found. He's now cleaning up with mitten I dropped.
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
I am more sore today than I was after my car wreck. Take it as a compliment that you bang harder than a semi-truck.
1. my parents still have sex. 2. being a screamer runs in the family. 3. so much so that i can tell what number of orgasms she's on. 4.so looks like i'm stuck outside a while
i do some of my deepest thinking on my wednesday morning walks of shame
I wish you'd make everyone's lives easier and do him already. Then we can get rid of him.
Dude, she sent me a nude of her posing in the mirror and her dad was in the reflection
I actively tried geting in the guy's pants and ended up in the girl's. I'm bad at this whole straight while drunk thing.
dude, no lie, I would make out with you in front of them wearing nothing but a rainbow colored speedo
Still at home. Videotaping hamsters.
That awful moment when there is no more beer and you find yourself considering tequila and aloe juice.
Opened the browser on my phone to a web search for midget birth rates per capita. A good night.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
Randomize
