yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
Haha na a cat just ran under your car. Howd that happen?
Probably a woman cat. Doesnt think things through
I'm at a party with that guy you made out with on new years. He remembers your name!
Woke up wearing just a scarf, the holidays are definetly here
She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
Just think, this time last Cinco de Mayo you were holding me up and finding me passed out in the yard of that house.
I walked in on you eating olive oil off of a plate. you gave me this look and I just started crying. we were that drunk.
Never thought I'd say this but I just want to go home, ice my balls, and pop a Vicodin.
No, listening to the fray and drinking a bottle of jack daniels does not count as counseling
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
My entire summer has consisted of being too drunk for this shit, too sober for this shit, or too hungover for this shit.
She was purple for Halloween. She literally spray-painted herself purple and called it a costume. It won't come off.
...I think i just fell in love with a random undergrad at first glance. He was the awkward young adult version of captain hook. Dear god i need to get off this campus.
Our office went out together for the first time to celebrate the fact our coworker got fired.
Randomize
