she takes plan B like it's going out of style
I had it in my eyebrows, my bangs, under one eye, and across both cheeks. Congratulations on the successful and elusive warpaint cumshot.
There are parrots here and they're headbanging to the music. There's also a clown and a pit bull that can jump onto tables. Too high for this shit.
And then. You beer bonged 3 tall boys. In a row. Fell into some kids lap. And pulled down my shirt trying to get up. Thank you for that. I got laid
I actually didn't mind her sub-par blowjob skills.. It took me back to a time when skipping class was noticed, and my liver didn't look like a worn out shoe
I think he's hit rock bottom. You know it's a low point in life when you cry because you weren't invited to sit in a box car and watch porn with two other straight dudes.
Ok, so technically yes she wore a red tank top to the stoplight party. But under it was a yellow bra and green panties.
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
Yeah we invited her back for chicken nugget sandwiches
Hold me and let me compliment your butt
I'm high. I apologize for that last sentence
She called to tell me she just hooked up with my crush...and that he talked about me...not sure if I should be pissed or excited?
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
easy for you to say. you're not the one who has to explain why you woke up with a pineapple and a used condom.
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
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