If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
im downtown. alone. lost. drunk. dressed as santa. dont find me. i just heard someone say mechanical bull.
omg he fucking fingered me this morning. and i was just like this is the most awkward alarm clock ive ever had
Next time we're there I want drunk pics of us trying to ride the stone lions downtown. Don't even attempt to fight me on this.
We found a swing set....it's in the front yard.
There's a middle eastern man wearing a cow costume with tequila coming out of his udders, but I'm not sober enough to feel uncomfortable with it.
ALSO, I NEED TO BORROW A CAT. ASAP
I just conducted a skype meeting drunk and in the middle of a cornfield. I don't even think they noticed.
As a general rule of thumb, I don't call until the claw marks have healed.
Oh my god I would go to planned parenthood the same day I get my nipples pierced
He gave me an extra phone charger for the other side of the bed the other night. Is that love?
I may be a complete scumbag but even im not willing to spend a grand and sit on a plane for 24 hours just for shrooms and a blowjob
I just bought six bottles of the 2 dollar vodka. oh yes there will be blood
He was 6'8" - I shit you not! He sat up in my bed and the ceiling fan got him right in the forehead.
he just got here with a handle of tequila and box of condoms. looks like i'll be spending the weekend in bed
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