um i just realized that some of the people at my family reunion look inbred. thats not a good sign.
hahaha beady eyes set close together? defs inbred.
my dads cousin just put a cig in his dogs mouth and says, "look its a commercial for newport!" holy hell i hope im adopted.
Unless I'm getting a singing midget telegram, I'm not going to smile
Found my sandals in your freezer this morning, THANKS
This is why I'm not putting my name in lights over your bed.
just so you know, the uglier twin gives better bjs..don't be deceived
dude. she was texting with her nipple. I love touch screen phones!
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
All I need in life is some dick and a big mac.
i told her she would have to blow me everytime we lost a game of beer pong, she never noticed i purposely hit our opponents in the face every other shot
i threw up in a box in my own lap driving today.
Did you know there is a guy on the porch, wrapped in your snuggie, singing no woman no cry and drinking wine coolers?
Sex in a tree, bucket list CHECK!
wish he had known he had poison ivy on his cock beforehand... Is calamine okay to put on your vag?..
i should probably stop doing things just because i think they’re funny. i’m not going to.
You took the glass microwave plate and said it was the closest thing to a frisbee, let me know how that works out for you
Randomize
