He said he wants to make an itinerary for the sex we'll have when I come home.
You act like I'm the first person to try and hook up with a blind chick.
she's a dental assistant. she can get nitrous. kinda looks like a sloppy bucket of fuck. time to take one for the team. NEED SHOTS STAT!!
You are so lucky that drugs are going to kill you before I do.
See this is why people shouldn't jump into marriage. See what type of drunk you're engaged to first.
I can HEAR him staring at your boobs.
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
I will now send you explicit pics of mine and her genetalia bound together forever in the devils dance that is sexting.
State dependent memory. I just needed to feel my teeth. It was like a fog was lifted.
Do I lose at life if I cry in a grocery store while buying a pregnancy test?
so serious though like its almost like I'm playing a game that's my life and Im always losing
There's something empowering about being at dinner and sitting across the table from two men you've blown.
He stopped in the middle of us fucking so he could turn on lithuanian techno music. And the sad thing is that it was the best sex of my life.
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
We are bad people. This is why we are friends. <3
Randomize