So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
the hot woman interviewing me is reading jokes off the back of laffy taffy.... I'm getting laid and possibly a job
Hold on im havin a staring contest with my cat
My epitaph should read "Margaritas: she never learned"
I wonder what my nutrition professor is going to think when I have to put 21 keystone lights, a bottle of merlot wine, and 5 rum and cokes and 4 shots of tequila on my dietary analysis
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
I just want you to know that I hid the weed. Once you find another job, I'll tell you where it is. Happy Hunting, bro.
No, the real question is if you drink like I drink why WOULDN'T you wear a cape.
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
The cops showed up and one of them got pushed in the pool. When he got out he looked really sad so I got him a towel and hugged him. He arrested all the underage drunkards but me.
not ubering you a puppy
Had a dream I was doing scat with Caroline. I need to lay off the cheese at night
He got mad at you last time bc you tried to rap battle him via text. This is strictly business.
You'll be pleased to know I just had an elaborate day dream about your penis. you were there too.
Randomize
