Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
walking home from your place the other day I saw a man with a ponytail sitting on some church steps petting a plant
he should get drunk with us
oh my god. i just found my camera... on top of the bush outside of my house. never let me drink everclear again
i am already firmly committed to doing irish carbombs w/ 12 different people, and the st pattys day party doesnt start for another 24 hours. i may die
Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
That was around the time you tried to kick me out for being rude to your fish.
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
My grandpa is giving me detailed instructions on how to fight a second floor bedroom fire from a ladder on the out side. Just in case
He showed up in a dinosaur costume bearing a tray of cupcakes. He even let me hold his tail. I'm marrying this guy.
I'm getting the lip of my vagina pierced & you expect ME to be the voice of reason?
Soooo fucked this chick last night! While fucking she started talking into the fan on the side of my bed. Does that count as sex with a robot
Let me be the vehicle for you to live out your slutty half-gay dreams.
she referred to her cum as “pussy butter” so needless to say we had a good night
Randomize
