yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
You really need to take down the pics of you and your boyfriend on facebook. It's becoming increasingly harder to jerk off while i'm Facebook stalking your pics at 2am.
i had to take my roommates dildo out of her suitcase so I could use it
the suitcase or the dildo?
her name was charlotte except you kept calling her chatroulette and yelling at her to show you her boobs
To tired for the bar. Came home and drank wine out of the bottle. Kind of don't want to know what that says about my life.
theres chocolate ground into my couch, nerds candy all over the floor and cocaine on every surface. great memorial day weekend and yours?
He made me cum 4 times, we high fived afterwards and then I proceeded to tell him about this guy I'm dating whilst I made him a bacon sandwich. I think we've finally mastered being friends with benefits.
I'm sending you the three minute video I jus took,....it's of me eating a pear up close
He's gonna be so upset when he get's a real job and can't do serious drugs.
Hey, dude, is Kevin still passed out on your porch?
Yeah. I'm gonna go leave a pitcher of bloody mary next to him in case he's still alive.
Maybe the "i killed someone" and "tequila makes my clothes come off" comments freaked him out.
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
holy shit! you were walking down a hill and just happened to be passing a trash can like 4 ft away and projectile vomited over a fence into the trash can. kept walking and drank a beer.
Visiting my great uncle went well. The highlight of the evening was when he said, "Oh my god. I'm 79 and I'm teaching 18 year old kids how to roll a joint."
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