i miss vodka and anonymity. college is so rich in both. in college we are a many armed creature, lubricated with beer and sex.
im having a hard time not telling ppl about ur bathroom story
You dont remember anything at all? So you dont remember the shop down my road with the 'TO LET' sign over it? You were adamant that the 'I' had fallen off and that it used to say TOILET...so you took a shit right there in the doorway.
Before I left in the morning I deleted her purity ring app off her iPod, I figured it would save her the shame
he let me duct tape his mouth because i said it was my fetish, i really just wanted him to shut up
We have a drunken confused pantless man in our apt. Boots.
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
How do you not remember seeing the kid from our chem lab table and repeatedly yelling "lab partners for life!" at him?
I was short on money so I let my roommate mase me for $60
I wish I could just hang out in ERs.
Things you Cant unsee: When your smartphone syncs to your dads laptop and downloads photos...including his porn stash.
Things are coming back to me in chunks. I vaguely remember signing a shirt that said 'I enjoy vagina'
I AM SO PROUD OF YOU
I wish you looked at me the way you looked at my brothers penis
Oh my fucking god that cat looks just like you after you accidentally took Ketamine
I have 3 bottles of vodka in my room telling me not to go to work tomorrow.
Randomize
