well you can't waste a boner
god damn woman. you are like the herpes of drunk texting. you never go away.
She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
You had already cockblocked me. The cops were just an assist.
OH GOD PAJAMAS ARE SUCH A HARD CONCEPT RIGHT NOW
He yelled "juice on the loose", yes i am sure i need plan b
I lost my keys but found four buffalo wings in my pockets
if i got ashes i think they'd burn a hole into my head with the amount of sins i've committed this year alone and it's only february
Some guy just showed up at my door to return my bikini top. EXPLAIN NOW
Girl, that was the lost night of 2012 for me and I have buried that night deep deep away..
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
Wedding party came into the bar an hour ago. Mother of the bride is a stage five clinger. send help.
i just woke up, first off why is there pineapple everywhere and who's underwear is on my ceiling fan ?
Never go to your parents' super bowl party. I learned, in great detail, "Why Aunt Trisha is a hoe" Not enough beer on the eastern seaboard.
Randomize
