So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
That's like rubbing a penis in my face and not giving it to me.
I demanded respect from my fuck buddy. Drunk me is not fun.
underwater hpnotiq shots? sure why not.
dude, apparently i tried to force feed my grandma bananas last night.
Learn from me. Do not smoke cigs and fold laundry in your room. The cigarette will fall into the dresser without you noticing and your shirts will be on fire. Wanna go shopping tomorrow? I need some new shirts.
Drinking a grey goose and water in a random chair that I found by the road by myself
So there's that.
In the last six hours i have procured a free sandwich, watched three movies, and came to orgasm. If that isn't productivity then i don't know what is.
I literally cut myself out of my pants. What is my life.
I spilled a whole plate of queso and salsa on my bed so I'm just eating it off my sheets with chips. How's your night going?
I told my coworker that I'd get him some edibles because he wants to rekindle his marriage. I'd better get some good karma out of this.
If the smell of things stopped me from putting things in my mouth. I wouldn't be popular with Grindr guys.
can we not speak foreign languages when I'm on drugs
I need an outfit that says "thanks for hiring me" but also says "i want dick in my mouth".
Randomize
