Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
Sundresses, hats, and big glasses. That is the greatest trick the devil ever taught women.
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
Do you think I could put your penis on reserve for tonight or tomorrow night?
dude, you were feeling up her boob for 20 minutes in front of the guy she was hitting on because you and her had an argument over who had bigger boobs.
hey man, it was for science okay.
I ate shit on a rock, and when I got up this car full of people asked me if I was okay, and I just sprinted away screaming "I am a banana!"
Best part of Friday afternoon drinking? Having ping pong balls thrown into my cleavage.
When he was fat he reminded me of my high school best friend and I just wanted to hug him and hug him. Also, he's funny and humor is the fastest way into my pants after Doctor Who and liquor.
Do you deliver to the black dark pit where I am? I think it's called.... The toilet? Right next to hell...
I bet the guy on the treadmill next to me with the noise-canceling headphones wishes he could trade them for smell-canceling noseplugs. Hard to believe that last one did not involve any pants-shitting on my part.
I feel like the universe head butted me in my balls. That hungover.
.... My lady balls. Cuz I'm a lady.
i got kicked out of McDonald's for demanding a margarita mcflurry
You are currently doing Harry Potter spells with the turkey-baster...
I WANNA... wait, will you kinkshame me?
Nah.
I WANNA KNOW WHAT HE SMELLS LIKE
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