i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
this wart on my finger ripped off while i was fingering this girl the other night. she thought she had gotten her period and started crying so i went with. its better for both of us that way
She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
It's okay. My lingerie drawer is skanky enough for the two of us. Even across borders.
I feel like, for the first time today, we had a healthy yolo.
No more jager for that guy. He jacked the neighbor kids big wheel, rode around making jet noises, then passed out behind the wheel and rolled it and broke his wrist
Well get back to your date and give him the ceremonial 1am handy and text me when your done.
I woke up this morning half naked, smelling like an ash tray, with an empty bottle of jack next to me, and now someone named Dora the anal explorer is texting me.
I asked him if we could switch positions so I could watch the Olympics... I'd say date number two is a miss
He was so fat that he broke two of my ribs
Maybe it's time to stop screaming I'm a chubby chaser every time you enter a drinking establishment
Three times. Three times I left home yesterday in search for sex, and three times I returned un-orgasmed.
I just had to explain to my grandma what a reach-around is. Too far..
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
Randomize
