ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
I woke up this morning with a hospital armband on containing all the information off my fake i.d. WTF did we do last night!?!?
she insisted that i refer to her boobs by name.
My spanish isn't great but I'm pretty sure he was calling me a "little monkey" while I was blowing him
Dude, you need to come clean your dates vomit off the ceiling. What in the hell were you guys doing?!
Dude. I only took a 20 out the ATM last night. How do I have 83 ones?
You stole from the strippers again. I wish I was ninja like you
How much do you charge for your Funyun and beer delivery service?
At least one of us had a weekend full of money and dick
C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
I can't. Currently naked covered in Nair trying desperately to catch his cat that rubbed up on my leg.
I hate that cat.
I'm gonna write a book. Almost Awesome: all the times I ALMOST got laid.
About to go make a man out of a 24 year old boy
As I shove my ninth taquito of the day into my mouth...
Picking our battles
I might be drinking a 4-day old opened beer on a Wednesday. You're in no position to judge me.
It would have only made it one day at my place.
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
Randomize
