Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
Turns out he's not gay. He just didn't know how else to say he's not into me. He just hit on my sister.
but i have a bet that her boyfriend is going to try and deflower her tonight so i better get a move on if i want to videotape it
I just recorded courtney puking and set it as my ringtone.
My number went up to seventeen today. I forgot to add my random hookup on a sailboat.
let's just pour the lemonade mix into the soco. cut out the middle man.
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
All I've succeeded in doing since I saw you is drool on my shoulder
He isn't understanding any of my Fetty Wap references. He may not be a keeper after all.
Hey! How are you feeling? Still preferring soup over sex?
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
We were on the beach when you spilled sand in the bottle and said "relax it's vodka, it'll disinfect itself"
I want a musical about memes.
Do you think it would be weird to wear a shirt that says 'big fun small package' from an ex for a first date?
I opened the bathroom door and the starting point gaurd was eating out my art history professor
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