We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
there was already a condom in her . . and it was bigger than me
At what point were we discussing suction-cupping a dildo to the wall?
You had a towel around you and you called it your shot bib.
there seems to be a considerable amount of hair missing from my left hand. i may have lit it on fire again
Snorting lines of xanex off the back of my grandparents toilet before church. Thinking of u.
i havent blinked in 235 seconds. now 247. now 258. 263. 267. 271. i also have been gifted with theability to both type and count and not blink. 293 so magical
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
Oh my god. I slept with my boyfriend last night. It was wonderful.
And when I say my boyfriend I mean my electric blanket. Because that's the kind of life I lead.
And now you understand the importance of Saturday naps.
Because you stay up all night having sex and eating sushi?
I'm drinking coffee out of a pasta sauce jar and eating fruit soaked in Smirnoff. I think I've hit rock bottom.
and that's when you shouted "ahh motherland" as you streaked down hall 4B
I was having a dream that I was swimming in a pool filled with melted chocolate but woke up to find I had poured chocolate milk all over my body
I gave him breakup sex, AGAIN
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