im in a room full of women tattooing each others tits. i hope i remember this tomorrow
The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
So many tools at one table, you'd enjoy my italian family
He had rug burn on his nose from my landing strip
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
Judging by what she did last night, I would say at least 4 of them have mono now.
that's why you don't digest questionable powders from girls wearing tutus at a dirty club
I mean Grimace is basically just a big piece of purple shit and he is loved way more than the hamburglar just to put it into perspective
If you invite me to a bar tonight my liver will kick you in the testicles
The bartender just legitimately thanked me for breaking the cycle of speed metal by playing mmmbop.
i don't think that has ever happened before in the history of man
All I can think of is a mama duck followed by her baby ducks, in brightly colored track shoes.
How high are you?
I think i just shit in their garbage can, I'm ready for that ride u owe bro.
I hope you get stoned and think that you're a seal in shark infested waters
We had sex six times. In a span of 8 hours. Confirmation I don't need to go to the gym.
that is our friendship pylon, do not lose it
fuck you.
DO NOT LOSE IT
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