fyi, i just bought my first strap-on. the little mermaid theme song was playing in the background.
Omg i either met the gayest dude ever or my next boyfriend
i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .
Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
After New Year's Eve I will be hibernating my life away. Only wake me up for skiing, schnapps, and sex. In that order.
porn backed up onto portable hard disk, laptop charged, battery backup in place, two cases beer, handle of vodka, poptarts and beef jerky --- bring it sandy.
Also if i get drunk and start crying about the elephants you all have my permission to abandon me.
Also not to brag but I got high last night and got us a host family in a chateau in the south of France
Sorry my phone died because I decided charging my vibrator was way more important
I woke up at 3am, top off, with campus security telling me to get dressed. Tonight was a GOOD NIGHT
He's a waste of a perfectly good penis.
GOD I WOULD STAB DANNY IN THE EYE WITH HIS OWN PENIS
.........That big, huh?
No. I would cut it off
She was blowing air into green onions and tying knots in them to make "balloons"
Randomize
