Denial is the first step to alcoholism…and I don't hate it
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
He's been grabbing my ass as a greeting since 2004, sex was overdue
She just kept tellin me God was coming back and he was leavin her with a bag of stale doritoes and shitty friends.
If im still in the bathroom puking when the sirens go off please distract the cops.
Everything sucks i just wanna cry and smoke a bowl and pet my cat and die. All at the same time
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
no joke- she just sprinkled parmesan cheese into her champagne and slurred "I just need a little snack"
We were talking when all of a sudden she reach and started squeezing my dick and goes "nice." and then just kept the conversation going like nothing happened.
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
ALMOST WRECKED MY SCOOTER. DAVE FRANCO HAS A TWIN AMD HE GOES HERE
Amanda, I can 99.9% assure you i'm probably never going to bang your mom
I DON'T LIKE THAT SENTENCE
She is carving a little coffin out of some wood for her hamster that died. I'm flying home tonight.
Sorry for trying to wake you up by slapping your ass with a fruit 2 go.
when i woke up with rugburns on the tops of my feet, knees, and chin i was a little confused. and then i remembered i had sex with him in his friends walk in closet.
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