He said he was from Mississippi and my vagina clamped shut like a frightened oyster
And this is weird.. I feel slightly less depressed after shitting myself.
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
I remember pointing out how smooth my legs were to try to direct his attention away from my vagina.
i lost his rear view mirror, your phone charger, and my lesbian virginity. 21 isn't shaping up too well so far.
He's covered in dirt and enchiladas. We're going drinking now.
Why are there sofa cushions on the floor? And why isn't there a sofa in this room that doesn't have cushions?
Yea you just drank all the Hookah water, then started talking gibberish about the Kool Aid you just drank.
You screamed "show me a dick stand!" But before I could ask you wft that was you had passed out in the corner
I know my whole body feels like I belly flopped onto concrete. Seriously need to tone it down for a while
have you ever seen all dogs go to heaven this is important
I promise that I won't shotgun beers with your boyfriend this time, Scouts Honor.
I thought you were dead but then you asked me if your tits looked good. They did.
Get over your kidney infection all ready. You have been sober for too long.
Randomize
