Believe it's possible to jerk off while watching the food network.
I hate it when you make eye contact with someone bcs you are about to make fun of them and they take it as a hint to come hit on you.
we're doing shots for every degree below freezing it is outside
I'm not 100% on this, but I'm pretty sure I just accidently talked my way into a threesome.
Stop trying to talk to my friends!!
then get some ugly ones...
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
Frozen waffles and wine. Loneliness-party of one
I JUST WANT TO WATCH PORN BUT THE CAT IS JUST SITTING HERE LICKING HIS BALLS. I CAN'T DO IT.
Just found out they make medicinal lollipops, bought like 40 of them. Gonna go fill a pediatricians lollipop bowl.
I wanted to be mature but the vodka was resilient.
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
Well, you've continued the theme of living with people who's dicks I've sucked.
I wanna hang out. The cats don't talk back.
She was hammered and showed her gay best mate a pic of my cock, his response was "I fucked the wrong brother"
On a side note apparently my brother is gay
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