I found a pair of size 15 female undies on my floor?? is that big?
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
Remember in school when they told us our vag was made just the right size for our future husband? I must say I am enjoying trying to find that perfect fit.
Using your Catholic School education as an excuse for this? Why didn't I think of that?!
searching my car for your cum before I have to give my grandma a ride to the airport. Thanks for this
I dare you try and top an Eiffel tower full of Margarita
you described his penis as a "portable fishing pole"
FACT: the parking lot attendant was yelling "NO SEX HERE! NO SEX" at yall.
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
I bet George Washington got SERIOUS head back in his hay day.
We can get high as fuck when there are no orders. If not its cool. I just figured Take Your Blunt Buddy To Work Day.
In related news... Actually, nope. I don't have any orgy-related news. You win.
So how exactly do I backtrack from motorboating and ass grabbing?
He showed up on school grounds wearing nothing but a suit of armor. Really at this point I'm more impressed than angry.
Adulthood is putting your bongs in the dishwasher because you're too lazy to clean them manually.
Are you ok dude?
So what we learned was that it doesn't matter how skinny the stripper is, if she sits on your knee with a torn acl for two hours it's going to swell up
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