You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
She called it mighty mouse.. And from there it was down hill
Just wondering why in an apartment full of stoners there is half a waffle in the TRASH CAN. get ur shit together man
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
I heard porn and smelled bacon cooking. I knew you had to be home.
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
all i remember was you yelling "look at my little feet" at everyone on the way home from the bar.
I slept with a married guy last night and then broke my toe on the doorframe on the way out. I've never seen karma work so fast.
It might've been him telling me last night that he "doesn't even need beer goggles to fuck me." When I thought that was sweet, I realized something needed to change.
U know when u get really drunk and u don't think anyone can see what your doing? If I'm that drunk the possibilities are endless
I just spent 20 minutes in a Subway trying to take a candid photo of the doppleganger of the guy I lost my virginity to instead of eating. That's all the evidence I need that my life is on track.
You don't even know. The entire marching band thinks I'm an alcoholic.
She kissed me, then said "mmm your face tastes like it needs my pussy on it."
I need to stop waking up with no pants on.
what happened this time
I dont know everyone was gone and there was a bird in the room
You tried to see how many socks you can stuff in yor mouth and I just put on a damp sock. Is this what bestfriends have come to these days???
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