so now she's a stripper
can't say i'm surprised
Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
I'm not inviting you over anymore if my cat keeps ending up in the freezer...
mate, my mother watched me threw up out of my nose wearing only a g-string.
She was horrified when I asked if they had any strap on chin dildos, I was at a sex shop for gods sake must I be judged everywhere
Your shoe was in the washing machine. I have it in my pocket. My phone rang before and I answered your shoe. Meet me at the bar in 10.
Got another job?
If by job you mean clever way of getting free tattoos, then yes. I got another job.
he didn't stitch me up last time. in fact, he yelled at me for bleeding.
The fact that he offered to stop once he stuck it in my ass was sadly the most considerate thing anybody's ever done for me.
Nothing more ironic than raw dogging some random Asian hottie last night and then doing the walk of shame home from her place mixed in with the participants of the AIDS walk
I told him I wish we were at my house cause then I could tell him to get out after we had sex.
I have one goal now that I am in the USA. To find a man I can fuck into marriage before my visa runs out.
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
Never drinking before a 6am train again. Just threw up at boarder control and had to pretend it was cause I was pregnant and not cause I trashed.
You make Europe seem so glamorous.
The closest thing I've had to an orgasm lately is sneezing nonstop from fucking allergies.
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