oh god the rape fog is back!
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
there was a kid getting taken out of the waterpark handcuffed to a wheelchair singing "tryna catch me ridin dirty"
I keep telling girls I work at the carnival and then guessing their weights. I'm pretty sure I'm about to get kicked out.
He literally sends me dick pictures, EVERY DAY. SEVERAL DIFFERENT ANGLES ..it's like I GET THE POINT.
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
Bro, she said my penis was the best thing to happen to her mouth since teeth.
You threw up in a empty pizza box at Pizza Hut and opened the door with your face. So that maybe why it's bruised.
I think he's an actor
That's not a good enough reason to wear guy-liner
She told me she loves wine, but hates the mud butt the next day. Dude, way to much info on a second date.
He told me that he wants to fuck me only wearing a princess tiara...How could I possibly say no to that?
I did it again.
I drunk texted John McCain.
I got my gum stuck on his balls.
He climbed over 2 rows of the cab and told some random girl we were riding with that he would be in the back seat if she wanted to have sex
I need to bang the neighbor boy. He’s given three women screaming orgasms this week alone.
Also, my apartment walls are too thin
Randomize