Did the walk of shame past her kids. I'm younger than one of them.
is it weird that i feel like i won the break up because my status change got two comments and his got zero?
Got free coffee because I told the guy at starbucks the pleats in his khaki pants made his cock look big.
How do you not remember seeing the kid from our chem lab table and repeatedly yelling "lab partners for life!" at him?
Nothing says walk of shame like leather pants in daylight
We dropped so many bottles they would only give us plastic cups. We actually drank ourselves back to preschool.
I just had to beg some random guy to help me climb through your porch window since the door was locked. FYI...i hear you having sex in there. You could of at least taken a break to unlock the damn door. WTF!!!
Don't pretend you don't want to dance on the edge of overdose all three nights
We're gonna be late. Scott went too far predrinking amd tried pierce his own lip with a poptab. Save me a beer, i'm gonna need it.
A dude was barking out of one of the buildings so I barked back and he goes, "Oh shit! She barked back! Come to room 803 I'll fuck you!"
He's a doctor now.. hope he can cure his small dick
Before you started puking your brains out, you took a moment to give me the correct order of the Harry potter series
I just got a lecture from your coked out sister about the monetary value of Dothraki hair braids. Take her home.
It was like the icing on a beautiful fuck boy cake.
I think i got my first booty call. it was like she came to my house. sex. leave.
Congratulations. Welcome to the wonderful world of quick dirty secret sexy time.
thanks... i think. haha
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