I need to go to a fraternity... my boobs are telling me to.
I wishh there was a lost and high section in walmart cause I would be there right now
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
Judging that there's a photo of me getting head while sitting on a graveyard tombstone.....not good.
I'll call you tomorrow. I'm ok and back i love you goodnight.
I stole a bike. Here's a pic
I want him in the "you're a terrible idea and are probably going to get me killed by my parents, my siblings, and my boyfriend" way
You beat him at the shot competition, and proceeded to rub it in while telling everyone to "ASK ME A MATH QUESTION!!!"
I had lunch with him today and quietly mourned his wasted good looks on such a disappointing set of genitals.
Making drunken Mac n cheese at 3 am I understand why witches constantly stir their cauldrons. Much more homogenized temperature and slim chance of boiling over. Good job witches.
Dude Carly, it's like, inconvinent how often you cause me to have an erection
All I want to do is ice my pussy, but then my husband would probably infer that I was not at a business meeting last night.
Found out my grandpa had two wives and found out I'm eligible for some internships 11/10 would do acid again.
Like, I want sex but I also would be okay with Netflix
Okay, so is being determined to have my vagina licked by a woman on Valentine's day an acceptable goal?
1st date with cop went weird. He yelled at me & we had a horrible date. Walking to the car I tripped & started bleeding & then he made out with me. Is it wrong that I want to see him again?
THIS IS WHY YOU NEED THERAPY!
Randomize
