Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
No, I'm only going to drink half my paycheck. That's the responsible thing to do.
Me and my dog bond so much when im high.
You were directing traffic around her for 30min after she passed out in the middle of the road.
You really are best friends.
Please tell me you're throwing the cats into this foot of snow.
I just picked up my chili cheese fries off the ground ate them, and then licked up the cheese that was still on the concrete. Thank you Jagerbombs
So I vaguely remember making out with you this morning, I think you were on a date?
I got shot at today. If that doesn't get me at least a blow job I give up working on the south side
She just kept introducing me to people by telling them which of their friends I've fucked
I just woke up in my ex-boyfriends bed, with my new boyfriends jersey on. I love March maddness.
We broke up in downtown Nashville with drunken, blow up penis waving bachelorette parties walking by. For some reason I can see this ending up as a country music video.
Sometimes i like to think we arent living together next year and that im living with models that like to experiment but you ruin that fantasy time and time again
I'm still a bit day drunk and decided to go for a run. You may get a snapchat of me vomiting soon
I haven't had a bra on since I quit my job.
She looks like a character that batman would try to kill, or something.
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