I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
i dont remember who you are as you are in my phone as "mr. peanut."
Only your vagina holds the key to what happened last night.
DDing is such a bittersweet job, just got the entire history of this girls hookup career
Joe decreed the livingroom and the hallway up to the burn mark his kingdom. I think this is the point of 'stage an intervention'
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
I'm at this kids house trying to figure out if I pissed in his kitchen new years eve. Lmao, stop letting me drink.
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
I asked if anyone's pants felt wet on the bottom, like a half hour after mine did. I had just peed my pants i had gotten so high no biggie
If you think you're having a bad day, know that upon waking up, I was informed that I blew my nose in a piece of bread last night
Okay I'm officially a Texan now, I banged a dude with cowboy boots
...Just hit my fuck buddy with my car.
you never know when your going to find a surprise from me in your bed...it keeps you on your toes.
I just bought a slurpee and condoms. God bless America.
admittedly, geting that drunk in front of my last two exes wasnt a good idea
probably didn't help that you cheated on them with each other either
Randomize
