just tell him he has love handles, he'll die of insecurity
just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
she called my cock the "semen sword" and then we invented a position called excalibur
Want any specific kind of beer?
Yeah. Alcohol flavor.
Got it. Anything but Miller.
oh no you fucking didn't eat my mac and cheese you cunt
She threw up in the hot tub how's your night
Saw a guy in a chef outfit covered in mustard talking jiberish into his phone running across the skywalk.
Bring it all. We will have a potluck of drugs. It will be magical.
Either call me back or tell me you're in jail. For fucks sake. If this is a cop, just help out. national league.
You act as if I'm the first person to pee in the Taco Bell drive thru at 2 AM, I'm sure a lot worse things have happen in that drive thru than my urine.
Yours weakened by children. Mine weakened by a forearm sized cock for 8 years.
He's acting like I should like him more than vodka and Taco Bell, but I just don't ser that happening.
You know you threw a brownie at my head last night. And said you did it to defend the turtles honer....
Had a very good bday. Have the teeth marks and bruises to prove it
This pandemic, it’s making everyone horny. I’ve got dick stashed all over town
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