He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
dude i need to stop getting high. i cant afford to eat like this...
no seriously. she's even got the premier of the real L word on her calendar at work. that lesbian.
Honestly, your dog is in better hands with that homeless guy.
Things I woke up with this morning: half a mcmuffin, orange hair, one shoe and a friendly german man. Tequila was a brilliant idea.
So he might be the smartest man alive. He had the stripper pick him up taco bell on the way to the room for an extra 50 bucks.
I'm kinda amazed by how many times I've texted the word penis today.
I feel strange, like something is off with my body
Yeah that's called sobering up, we've been drunk for the past 4 days
Please come home, i don't want to feel like basket garbage girl but I'm in your alleyway and not sure how to change that.
That guy is like a clown car of sexy. Just when I think I've seen it all, THERE'S MORE.
AND SOME IN THE TRUNK.
I swear if he puts my hand anywhere near his dick tonight I'm "accidentally" leaving all my rings on
The best thing about this time of year is that all I have to do is add a random mardi gras decoration to my cart full of alcohol and boom, no more judging
Right before he dumped me... he got a really ugly pair of pants. They were twill pants. A pinkish color. When I'm sad... I picture him in them. It makes me smile.
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
My sister and her gf showed up at my door with no pants on at 4 AM talking claiming its hot.
Randomize
