A joint and a Nerds Rope = breakfast of champions for the unemployed
Did I tell you he has dinosaur sheets?
What part of "waking up in the crawl space of my house with a raccoon" sounds like a good night to you?
He tried to blame not having a condom on the economy.
So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
wait a second. did i just remember you the other night referring to your tits as tia and tamara.....
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
Its ok we found him,,, He is in the bathroom trying to write his life story on a roll of toilet paper.
drunk waterpark is besst waterpark.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to concentrate on legal issues with the ghost of his giant penis in me?
I keep replaying commercials about kittens frolicking and was crying nonstop. WILL MY PERIOD LAST FOREVER!?
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. She asked how my day was going and it got hard.
the cuervo was good, but I started with jello shots. and when i threw up a whole jello shot came out.
I don't know if I'm having early flu symptoms, a miscarriage, or am badly hungover. Web md agrees.
You remember my neighbor with the perfect ass? It's even better in assless chaps.
Randomize
